| Correspondence between Judd
Apatow ("Undeclared") and Mark Brazill (who created "That 70s Show"
with the Turners). Topher Grace expressed interest in being on Undeclared and
Brazill flipped out and wouldn't let him. When Judd called him to find out why
he couldn't be on Undeclared, Brazill didn't return his phone calls so Judd emailed
him. As far as Judd remembered, Brazill was a nice guy he kind of knew from his
early days of stand-up.
> Mark,
I am writing you because I
left a message but did not hear back. I understand from Gail Berman that you were
upset about me not calling you to ask if Topher could do our show. Since Fox executives
were talking to Topher about it I thought it was cool with you. Also, since I
hadn't written it yet, I wasn't at the point of asking if it was possible to have
him do it. I would have called your show then. I mentioned the names of several
people who were interested in doing cameos on our show to the Variety guy. They
decided to only mention Topher. Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it. I didn't
realize it would create a problem. I never wished to offend you. If there is some
protocol to people on Fox doing guest shots on other Fox shows, I didn't know
what it was. Regardless, I'm sorry that this resulted in such a mess. If you are
mad at me about this or something else from our past, please tell me. I only remember
us having fun in the early nineties and it troubles me that it seems like you
have a beef with me.
Best regards,
Judd Apatow
>
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Judd, Yeah,
we were friends in the early nineties. And if you don't recall what happened,
I'll remind you. I had a pilot at MTV called "Yard Dogs" about a rock
band living in Hollywood. I told you about it and you proceeded to completely
rip it off, storyline and all, for the Ben Stiller show. You called it "Grungies."
MTV and UTA were working on an overall deal (MTV's idea) with me, based on that
pilot. When it turned up on your show everything went away overnight. I had just
had my son Jack and I had no job, no money, nothing. There's a saying, "I
forgive but I don't forget. And I don't forgive." So, now you know. Although
I kind of think that you already did. * Mark > ------------------------------------------------------------ >
Mark, I truly don't remember anything you are talking about. Jeff Kahn wrote
The Grungies sketch, a parody where we did Seattle bands as The Monkey's. I don't
remember you ever calling me after that saying you were mad. Ben and I would get
fifty sketches a week from the writers and then we'd pick the one's that we thought
were funny. I never connected the two. Even now they don't seem similar. Ours
was a goofy over the top parody, not a situation comedy about musicians in LA.
Nobody watched our show so I don't see how that could be the reason your pilot
died. That sketch aired once up against 60 Minutes, so it didn't have any impact
in town. I am sorry you are upset. I am not a thief of ideas. I'm sorry
you believe differently.
Judd Apatow
>
>
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Judd,
The show I wrote was also over the top and it let down the fourth wall.
Since it's registered at the WGA, you could compare the
two. And as an Exec Producer, we both know you have input
into every sketch. As for no one seeing the show everyone
knows everything in Hollywood. There are no secrets. Personally,
I feel you've made a career out of being a sycophant to
Carrey or Shandling or Roseanne and when you weren't kissing
ass, you were stealing from lesser known comics or leeching
off other people's ideas (Celtic Pride, Cable Guy).
I noticed how
outraged you were to not get a writing credit on Cable Guy until it came out and
was panned. You dropped that cause like the showbiz weasel you are. You may not
think you're a thief but most comics know otherwise. And again, you know that
too. Have you ever read "What Makes Sammy Run"? I think you'd like it. Get
cancer. Love,
Mark
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Mark, Come
on, we all wrote for comics at the beginning of our careers. I wrote for Roseanne,
you wrote for Dennis Miller. If that makes me a sycophant, then I guess I am.
And so are the writers for Caesar's Hour. I dropped my Cable Guy law suit
not because the film got bad reviews, but because I spent eighty grand on it and
my lawyer told me I was going to lose. You would be upset if you re-wrote the
vast majority of a script and received no credit. I wish you had called
me about this years ago. I'm sure we could have worked it out. Try not to be so
angry. Not everyone is as bad as you think. You should call Jeff Kahn and
ask him how that sketch originated. If it turned out that I didn't steal your
idea would you still want me to get
cancer? I swear to God that I didn't know
you were mad about this. Until six weeks ago I was still referring to you
as an old friend. Maybe one day I'll be able to say that again. Judd Apatow
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Mark, It's
come to my attention that you are upset with Judd Apatow about the sketch, "The
Grungies." I completely understand why you would have been pissed off about
seeing something similar to what you were working on at the time. However, the
idea for, "The Grungies," and all the initial writing and rewriting
came from me. I also cast it, acted in it and
edited it. I was and still am
influenced by pop music and I thought it
would be funny to satirize the seriousness
of the Seattle grunge music scene with the ridiculous superficiality of "The
Monkees" 1960s show. I hope that this clears up any misunderstanding. By
the way, I am a huge fan of "That 70's Show." Congratulations on
its well deserved success. I also think it's cool you set it in Wisconsin. I went
to the University of Wisconsin at Madison and loved it. If you have any other
questions don't hesitate to E-mail me. Jeff Kahn
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>
>
Mark, I have no interest in talking with you on the phone any more.
I know you are very successful and think that gives you the right to judge people
and berate them regardless of the facts, but I have had enough of you for one
day. I know it's hard to believe that your rock band TV idea, which every
writer in this town has thought of at one point, was not on my mind half a year
after you told it to me. Yes, you thought of breaking the fourth wall. Groucho
and George Burns stole it from you. Maybe you should sue Bernie Mac. Why
don't you sue the guys who have that new show "How To Be A Rock
Star"
on the WB. I must have told them your idea. Nobody has ever
goofed on rock
bands, not Spinal Tap or The Rutles or 800 Saturday Night Live sketches.
I should have told everyone on the show, no rock band sketches,
that's Brazil's area. So hold on to your hate and rage,
even though it makes no sense.
I'll go back to my life of thievery and leaching. As for
the cancer,
I'll wait till you get it and then steal it from you. By
the way, that joke was one of my writer's, Rodney Rothman
(see I credited him). See, I have no original thoughts.
Sorry I bothered to figure this out.
Judd
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Judd
How appropriate that you had to use someone else's joke to take a
swipe at me. I told you my idea. You did it two weeks later, VERBATIM. Spew revisionist
shit all you want. Everyone knows you're a hack. Also, everyone knows how you
fucked over Paul Feig on the new show. All your press mentions "your"
brilliant Freaks and Geeks, as if Feig didn't even do the series. It must
have killed you when the true genius behind it got nominated for an Emmy. Is your
wife still livid about someone in the neighborhood building a house just like
hers? Tell her I know how she feels. The reason I called was to tell you to piss
off. We'll never be "friends", regardless of the pussy whining from
your last e-mail. I respect you zero. See ya at the upfronts, bitch! Well...unless
you get canceled before that. Until then, die in a fiery accident and taste
your own blood. (Is that too angry?)
> Love, Brazill ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------ Mark,
>
I hope your anger is a joke, because if it isn't...wow. Here's a line
by line reply. I have starred (*) the replies if you are confused by my format. >
How appropriate that you had to use someone else's joke to take a
swipe at
me.
> ***That was the joke. How interesting that you couldn't
understand
that. You would think someone with the lineage of "Yard
Dogs" would have the intellectual acumen to pick up
on that. I feel for the writers that have to pitch to you.
Never doubt how much they hate you. I told you my idea.
You did it two weeks later, VERBATIM. Spew revisionist shit
all you want.
>
***How could I hear your idea, steal it, and then have it
air two weeks later? It was a filmed sketch show . Sketches
were written months before they aired. They were filmed
six weeks before they aired. I thought you were a producer.
Shouldn't you understand how these shows are made? Do you
start writing episodes two weeks before they air? Maybe
you
stole "Yard Dogs" from me.
Everyone knows you're a hack.
***That's why I kiss the ass. Let me know who thinks
I am a hack so I can kiss their ass as well. I also suck dick lately. That's how
I got my Dreamworks deal. > Also, everyone knows how you fucked over
Paul Feig on the new show.
All your press mentions "your" brilliant
Freaks and Geeks, as if Feig didn't even do the series. It must have killed
you when the true genius behind it got nominated for an Emmy.
>
>
***I'm sure it's hard for you to believe, but I do not control the
national
media. That is only true in your paranoid mind. If I create
a show they often
mention the last show. If you create a new show by yourself, I doubt they will
spend a lot of time talking about the
Turners. When they write about "That
80's Show" I am sure they won't
ever mention "That 70's Show."
I wrote an entire article in the LA Times, a cover story in the calendar, that
credited Paul for his work. He went from a struggling actor to an established
writer/producer over the course of a year. He is still my friend and I am very
happy that he was nominated for two Emmy's. He deserved it. I wasn't upset about
his Emmy nominations, I already have enough. The certificates are so big you can
only hang so many before it starts looking tacky.
>
>
> Is
your wife still livid about someone in the neighborhood building a
house just
like hers?
>
> *** Yes.
> Tell her I know how she feels.
> ***I'm on it.
> The reason I called was to tell you to piss off. We'll
never be
"friends," regardless of the pussy whining from your last
e-mail.
>
> ***The funniest part of these e mails is how bad your
sense of humor
is. You neither get nor can tell a joke. After you said "get
cancer" did you really think I was looking to heal our relationship? Usually
the cancer insult is a closer. I'm sure everyone who has suffered with that appreciates
your sharp wit.
>
> I respect you zero.
> ***Oh no.
>
See ya at the upfronts, bitch!
> Well...unless you get canceled before
that.
>
> ***If you think cancellation hurts me at this point, you
haven't been
> following my career as closely as I thought. I guess you
are too busy
> tracking my real estate problems.
>
> Until
then, die in a fiery accident and taste your own blood.
> ***That's a
Sam Kinison line you stupid fuck!!!! Hypocrite!!!!
> J'accuse!!!!
>
> (Is that too angry?)
> Love, Brazill
>
>
> ***Mark, I have enjoyed this. It's good to see the tragedies of the
> past few months haven't watered down your passion. I guess if Mark
>
Brazill doesn't go insane over stuff that makes no sense, the
terrorists
> win. > Good luck with "That 80's Show." And I look forward
to "That 90's
Show."
>
Judd Apatow All 100% true.
That ran around Hollywood in December, 2001, was reported
in the trades, etc.
Then,
two weeks later... this:
You are invited to a special presentation
of "The Angina Monologues or
Much Ado About Nothing". Please come
Tues. Dec 18th for wine & hor d'
oevres and a special dramatic reading
of "The Mark Brazill/Judd Apatow
emails" The performers will be
concealed to protect any future career
they may have in Hollywood. Let's
enjoy some Holiday cheer at the expense
of others.
The performance
will take place in Area 51 which is adjacent to The
Improv located at 8156
Melrose Ave. 7:30PM wine & hor d' oevres Showtime is 8:00PM | 
